The Brain Twinkey | Your Fake News Source Since 2008

In what is going down as the biggest embarrassment in the Macy's Day Thanksgiving Parade, an inflation malfunction or a design malfunction on the Ronald McDonald balloon has many in an uproar. The malfunction in the balloon reveals the popular clowns private area and gives the appearance of him having a bulge in his neither-region.

As each balloon is carefully inspected and during rehearsal inflated, the assumption is a malfunction in the balloon itself must have occurred on the final inflation on Thanksgiving Day. Everything had gone perfect in rehearsals so no one bothered to re-inspect the balloon before entering the streets of Manhattan for the parade, or at the very least to look up.

It didn't take long to realize what had happened as the thousands of people lining the streets were pointing up at the Ronald McDonald balloon; many in hysterics, many diverting children's eyes, and many disgusted. Due to all of the networks, the advertising and the performances all being on a perfectly timed schedule there was nothing that could be done but to proceed with the parade and continue down the assigned route. No one has yet to claim responsibility for the incident and it is still unclear whether this was truly a malfunction or a very well thought out and well put-together prank.

Either way there is only silence coming from the Macy's and McDonald's camps up to this point.

Throw away the turkey grandma, KFC is taking over! In an announcement that may change the face of Thanksgiving, KFC will now offer a complete four-person Thanksgiving Dinner for only $29.95. "We decided that it was time for the holiday to change a bit" said Justin Voorhees, the new CEO of KFC, "Turkey has ruled the roost since the days of the Pilgrim. That's about to change. We are going to take twenty pound chickens and deep fry the whole thing. Biscuits, potatoes, cranberry, stuffing and pumpkin pie, all the fixins!" When we asked him what prompted the decision Voorhees said that the economy has people cutting back and the traditional holiday meal is not affordable to many. "If you went out and purchased all the normal items that goes with a turkey dinner you can spend from $200 -$2,000 dollars if not more!" Vorhees explained. "Anyone who wants all those fabulous herbs and spices they have grown to love over the years, mixed in with a Thanksgiving feast then pre-order your meals by November 22nd and not only will you get a fabulous meal but it's affordable as well!"