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James Bond's Daniel Craig caught 'stirring' his martini - causes disturbance



If it wasn't bad enough with the recent horrible reviews for his latest stint as James Bond, Daniel Craig was recently videoed 'stirring' a martini at a local pub in Manhattan. Craig, realizing his mistake and noticing that he was being videoed, abruptly rose from his corner table flipping the table on its side. Simultaneously he reached into his inside pocket and pulled a small round object out smashing the object on the floor in the middle of the pub. The object began to smoke profusely instantly filling the pub with a think white gas; many customers dove to the floor taking cover. Craig then pressed a button on the side of his watch shooting a small wire into a cross-beam and swung across the pub snatching the video camera out of the patrons hands landing on the far end of the bar. He then jumped down and while crouching stuck a small amount of C4 putty on the exit door with a timer that he quickly set to 5 seconds and dove back over the bar taking cover. The door exploded and Craig quickly left the bar running backwards, and with both hands shaped like guns he pretended to fire bullets over every one's head while yelling "Bang! Bang!"
Running at full speed Craig clicked his key chain opening the sunroof on his white Lotus and leaping over the rear bumper through the sunroof landed in the drivers seat and sped off in a flash! He sped around the corner and down to the pier where he drove the Lotus off the end plummeting it into the sea. The police were called to the scene but upon their arrival Craig was long gone. The police are going to send divers down to where the Lotus entered the sea but one has to assume the Lotus he was driving transformed into a submarine and Craig is long gone.
If anyone sees a white Lotus out in the ocean that's probably Craig and you are asked to contact the Coast Guard immediately.



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