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Uneaten Halloween Candy put Hospitals in Financial Hardship.

Hospitals all around the United States are finding themselves in financial trouble after over-estimating their financial goals for October and November. When hospitals put together budgets for the year one thing always is a constant; Halloween will always bring in increased dollars. Children overeating their candy and getting sick, candy that was spoiled and even in several locations candy with some type of poison. There are also the party goers who drink too much, fights and other adult-type disturbances that go along with the holiday fun. Whatever the incident hospitals will always over staff Halloween night and the days that follow. The last few years there has been a significant drop-off to the candy related incidents and because of this the hospitals have been spending more then they have been making and many people have lost their jobs because of this.

"Parents seem to be taking more interest in what their children are eating." Says one hospital Administrator. "It's great for the children's health, obesity in our youth is at an all time high. Great for the kids, not so great for hospitals. We are a business you know."

Another anonymous hospital Administrator said that even though the last few years has had a drop off in candy related admissions, Halloween is on it's weekend run (this year a Friday and next year on a Saturday) so that always increases their admissions. "We should be okay for the next few years and when Halloween falls during the week we will re asses our yearly goals."

Every Administrator we spoke to wished to remain anonymous although each of them had almost the exact same thing to say.


jerine said...

hey joshua,

thanks for stopping by my site. by the way, is this post true?

The Brain Twinkey said...

Hi Jerine - Thaks for stopping by!No - most of my writings are satire. This stuff gets in my head and I have to write it down. From time to time (okay...almost never) I may write about something that's true but I will document a source if that's the case. As I mention on my blog page:
Visitors of the ZONE
Unless quoted or noted all entries are fictional. No harm or disrespect is meant just good old fashion fun! Enjoy!
Hope to see you again.


Prefers Her Fantasy Life said...

Written in fun or not, you're onto a good idea: changing Halloween to the last Saturday of October (along with the time change) to help the retailers, bars, and hospitals. It's the least we can do for a failing economy.

HektikLyfe said...

>Jerine: This blog is in the same spirit as "The Onion" if you know it.

>Twinkey: Thanks for the appreciate to my tag comment "skills." I try to make it more like a community conversation than a sickness that is spread. I figure that makes tagging each other more personable.

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visitors of the zone

Unless quoted or noted all entries are fictional. No harm or disrespect is meant just good old fashion fun! Enjoy!

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