The Brain Twinkey | Your Fake News Source Since 2008

"Recycle....recycle....recycle....bill...recycle." This is the typical out loud discussion that millions of Americans have between themselves and their mail. Thousands of hours are spent each year opening mail to only find out it's junk, or immediately ripping and recycling (or throwing away, depending on the State you live in) because the envelope is a give-away that the content is of no interest.

There is probably no way to ever end the endless train that is junk mail, primarily because a lot of these junk mail distributors and using a name with the subheading stating "Or Current Resident". If you ever ask for a company to stop sending you junk mail, it doesn't stop that company from selling their list of names and addresses to whoever asks, and more junk mail piles up.

Recently a group of people got together to fight back!

The group (named The Junk Mail Bandits) decided as a whole that they would open every piece of junk mail that they received, and any letters that had return envelopes with prepaid postage would be immediately put in the mailbox. "They are wasting my time by sending this to me and I never asked for it" said the groups leader, Jon Potter. "Especially Capitol One! I get two, sometimes three pieces of junk mail from them a day! So I send back the return postage-paid envelope empty; other times I will put the items they sent me right back to them. Make them pay the postage! POWER TO THE PEOPLE!"

What started out as a group of 5 has now escalated to an unknown number as many who are not affiliated with the group have also began the return mail.

"It's kind of fun." said one person who wished to remain anonymous. "I don't find opening the junk mail is a waste of my time anymore. I actually look forward to it."

It is unknown how this is affecting the junk mail companies, but one can hope that the outcome could reduce the number of junk letters being sent.

An interesting thing happened to The Zone recently where a reader sent in a question to our email inbox. We, the Zone Staff, felt it deserved a response. Not only did the question deserve a response we felt that the response would be best answered in a post. Here is the question that we received with our response.

Dear BrainTwinkey,

I have been reading your posts for some time and I keep asking myself the same question over and over again: Do you really like Twinkies? You have mentioned Twinkies several times and even written a poem about them. If you do really like Twinkies where do you rank them with other snack food? Thanks, Julie B - San Antonio

Dear Julie,

It's funny that you ask this question as you are not the first one to ask (you are the second). Although I have to wonder if you have ever actually had a Twinkie before? THEY'RE DELICIOUS! Soft, golden, sweet spongy cake on the outside, and wonderfully sweet cream filling. It's the perfect combination. Throw a slice of Vermont Extra Sharp Cheddar Cheese into the mix and heaven awaits!
Sure, there are other things you can snack on that are healthier, and please, have a healthy snack from time to time. But when you are having one of those days where nothing seems to please you, head for that gas station quick mart, dust off the oldest Twinkie on the shelf and dive into freedom!